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Community Performance Inc.

June 02, 2008

Two days and counting before we open, and I'm making yet another change to the script.

For many and various reasons, I chose to use the image of the piano to stand for a death in the community. Those reasons are too big and to varied to even begin to write about in a blog. To say it, we are handling a very difficult story, in a first time project.

What I held artistically in my head and on the page as a good working image, months ago when i wrote this, has, in the process of creating the theater of it, become something of a struggle as we have deal with it off of the page and onto the stage.

One part of the community felt we were saying too much with how we described and worked with this piano. And One part of the community thought we were not doing enough. I am grateful to this whole community that they have come, and spoken up, not after the process, but during it, to help us guide it- to co-produce the best and clearest way to tell the story. It is important, I can't say how important it is--- that NO ONE has come to us and said "you cannot tell that story". People from all parts of the community believe the story should be told. Which is in itself strong. We are now, through the process of talking, holding authentic conversations, rehearsing, reworking, rehearsing, and re-HEARING, how we can best tell this story for everyone.

All week, I was just watching us try to work and work and work with this image. In all honesty, I used the image of the piano instead of the actual man because *I* was actually at the edge of my comfort zone writing this one. (It's a dangerous story to handle in so many ways.) It took all of my own courage to put this one on paper. And for weeks, I'm watching us try to work this image and I'm thinking, we're just working too hard at this. If we're working this hard, then face the facts, Jules--- The image is just wrong. We talked last night and all agreed. And we open in two days.

We were in discussions, sitting around the table at the Greek restaurant last night first, then went home and sat in the living room continuing it, and then...it comes. Clarity. I see the picture of what is to be,, I start hearing in my head the words that need to be said and I grabbed my computer, thumping the keys into life. I'm writing it and thinking, gee, Of course. It's so simple. Why didn't I see it sooner? But I think we had to go through the difficult in order to get to the simple. The simple is this: It was a death. of a man. It was also the mistreatment and removal of people, but the catalyst, the thing which made people say "no more" was the man's death. And there are only so few ways we can speak this, in the way it needs to be spoken. I was trying so hard to be careful. We all were. When we got to the point where we could actually talk about it, the hard part, then we could move forward and talk about the simple part-- the fact and the history of this event.

I cut 3/4 page of dialogue that spoke about the piano and what happened to it. And then I added two simple phrases to the story which was already written- the part of the story which no one had trouble with-- which dealt with the fear of that night. The piano references are gone. Jane begins to speak her usual lines about singing together as a community, and that's how you build a community, you sing together. The she says:

JANE
And then something happened.

JANE
We won’t be marching alone.

Most of this scene is exactly the same. With the omission of the piano reference, replaced with the simple clear reference of the man: "If it could happen to him, it could happen to me"

I believe the whole truth is spoken, simply, clearly, and in many ways, safely. And in most ways, still on the edge of the comfort zone of all involved. We speak the truth of the event.

The use of the piano image was, all along, a safety measure. Perhaps we were trying to be too safe. I was trying too hard to be safe. Or, Perhaps, we (I) had to start in a safe place to get to the real, simple truth. I read it to he boys last night. Brackley, Iega, Joe and Richard all thought, "yes, this speaks the story, it is clear that a man died, it was clear that people were afraid for themselves and their community". This is the heart of the story. it came to clarity. Finally.

I read it for the two leaders this morning, who were also having trouble with the scene. They liked it. I read it for Barbara this morning, she is the one who had given me the story. She said she was OK with it, but she was also OK with the piano, because it distanced the death of the man for her- he was her neighbor, and his daughter is her neighbor. She is speaking to his daughter today. We'll put the new scene in the show tonight, and run it several times, and then check in with the cast to see if the temperature is right.

But through it all I say Good God. Or God is Good. We are talking with and communicating with each other, we are co-producing at deep, deep levels. We are not turning each other into villians. It so often happens that deep into process when the stress is so great, we being to lose sight of who we, each other, are to one another. When things get difficult, or something is misunderstood, in these difficult times, I am often no longer seen as loving caring Jules, but some jerk trying to impose my politics on the group. When, in my truth, I'm really feeling like I'm doing what is being asked of me. And in these stressful times, they are not stubborn or resistant, I have just misunderstand what they are asking me to do or not do. Stress often creates misunderstandings, and blurs our true intentions with each other. HERE, in this project, as misunderstandings arise, we are talking them through. They are coming to us to talk them through, while we are in process, while there is still time to do something about it. They know we are for them.

All along, we have tried having open communications, regularly, consistently. We have done community readings and check-ins, and have continued to have regular meetings. And after our discussion with Iega last night, we've decided it MUST be a CPI protocol, to have not only rehearsals, but also weekly forums, or check-ins, as a vital part of this process. We are building more than theater, and we need to create and build the space in this process for that other part. To provide a forum to speak into whatever is arising through the process of creating community together. Iega agreed to be our forum facilitator. It's exhausting and exciting, and we're looking at the future of where our work will lead us.

Before, we would address issues if they came up, or if anyone took the time out to talk about it. But now we are going to be proactive within our process from day one, to provide this space, this forum, to address goals, issues, both personal and community-wide, to truly work at being community performance- a community performing itself.

the talks, the removal of the piano, the changing of the script two days before opening, it is all good. It is all right, it is all part of the process. We must never be too afraid to face something by saying "It's too late for that". It's never to late to get it right.

And just to say it, a few prayers said our way wouldn't hurt right now, either.

   

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